Thoughts, part UN

I know you dont read this. I know no one probably ever will. This is for me. My Catharsis. Insecurity. Thats all I am. A giant ball if insecure. But in the when and now of today, where can you be secure. So many crazy people. SO many patterns. I follow the same pattern every time. I cant fix everyone. Or anyone. Im not a soul repairman. The best i do is put a band aid on it. Im broken myself. I need to secure my own stiches before i can tend to anyone elses wounds. Woah. too much bullshit wordplay. too many periods for that matter. Ive given life my all right now, and it seems like everything is falling apart. I have myself stuck in a job i hate, making minimum wage, barely scraping by, depressed. I can hardly work up the smile anymore to fake that i actually like the place im at in my life. I should have stayed in school. i could be making 100k a year by now. instead i make 11. I will finish tomorrrow.